Crossover fanfiction

[tallulahgs]

On the second day of Christmas, my true love (who knows me well) gave to me

Two dangerous games

[Title] Dirty Little Secrets
[Fandom] Death Note/LIFE
[Rating] PG-13 for making out
[Pairing] Raito Yagami/Tatsumi Sako
[Notes/Summary] Two high-achieving, charming, pleasant Japanese teenagers come to realise that underneath it all, they have other similiarities.



Raito has known for years now that most people are rotten underneath and nearly everyone is hiding something, but he's still taken slightly aback to find such concrete proof of it.

The pictures of the bound schoolgirls are good-quality, no doubt taken with that digital camera Sako carries around with him. Because they're real, Raito can tell, they have the composition and slight asymmetry of non-professional photographs.

Ryuk, looking over his shoulder, cackles and says something about how humans are even weirder than he thought, but Raito doesn't listen.

He only turns the pages to see if there are any other vices revealed. Thinking about it afterwards, he should have put the book back in the drawer right away and stored the knowledge for later, kept up the pretense that he and Sako are friends even though he's only at Sako's house today because they're working their rivalry into revision techniques. But he doesn't put it back. He looks at the blind, mute girls and if he thinks of people who are unseeing and of people obeying his every whispered word and walking towards their own demise, well, what exactly is the problem with that?

(His incriminating notebook would never be discovered by someone accidentally opening a drawer. That's one to him.)

He doesn't put it back and he's only looking for evidence among these still, frozen images of still, frozen girls when he hears the door open again and realises now he's the one who's been caught out.

Sako is standing there holding two cans of Coke. His face has gone very... blank. Most guys whose little predilictions you discovered would be red and stuttering and making excuses but Sako is just watching. Waiting to see what Raito will do.

"Oooh, you're in trouble now," Ryuk murmurs, and hops onto Sako's chair to watch.

Raito sees no reason to sacrifice his own standing. At least, not yet. After all, Kira's got morals to uphold, hasn't he?

"What on earth is this?" he demands, making his own voice sound just a little scared. "I - how could you -"

Sako puts the drinks down on his desk, and, still watching Raito, reaches backwards, pushes the door closed, and clicks down the lock. There's only the light from the side lamp now, and the cold glow from the darkening sky, through the blinds. And they still just watch.

"I asked you a question," Raito says. "It's not - it's not shop-bought. Is it? These photographs are real. What the hell is this, Sako-kun?"

"You don't like them?" Sako closes the distance between them until he could reach out and snatch the book away if he wanted - but he doesn't.

"How could anyone like them?" Raito wonders why Sako is letting himself lose so easily, making it so obvious that - "These are real people here. It's sick. If there's some kind of excuse you'd better spit it out right now."

Sako watches him for a moment. Just watches. Raito suddenly wants to punch him. Play the game, don't you see how much trouble I could make for you? Don't act as if - as if -

Sako smiles.

Then he grabs Raito's shirt, yanks him forward. His breath is hot on Raito's face, and this close Raito can feel he's quivering slightly.

"You shouldn't snoop about in other people's possessions, Yagami-kun," he says. "Didn't anyone ever tell you that?"

"I -"

I'm surprised someone as clever as you didn't just think of putting them back right away," Sako says. "Why didn't you? Is it because you found them interesting?"

"Shut the hell up!" (I'm not falling for that.) Raito drops the book, wrenches Sako's hands off him. "I wasn't thinking about how to hide my sins -"

"Give me a break." Sako snorts, looks at him as if he's pathetic (or as if he were expecting a more worthy opponent too). "You don't think I haven't noticed? Yagami-kun who all the girls think is so wonderful, but who doesn't actually give a damn about any of them?"

What?

Sako has just, just reached into his head and yanked out a thought as if Raito hasn't even tried to present what's acceptable -

"Don't you ever wonder how far people will go for you?" Sako says. "Don't you ever want to see how much you can get them to do?"

(As if, as if Raito is some child, as if he's never seen anything terrifying or had to make any choices, as if he doesn't know there's a shinigami watching them and laughing right now -)

"So, it's all consensual, then?" Raito raises an eyebrow. "Seems a bit sordid to me. Do you get them to call you master and kiss your feet?"

Sako's eyes narrow.

"I suppose it's because of Anzai-san," Raito says, putting together hints he knows he's always known but never articulated before. "You're only dating her because her father is so eminent, aren't you? I doubt someone like her would be interested in anything like this. Do you dream of forcing her into it? Do you -"

Sako grabs him, shoves him backwards until they hit the wall. Raito feels the breath knocked out of him but he doesn't get a chance to recover before Sako has slammed him against the wall again and then, leaning in close, whispered, "You didn't answer my question. Don't you ever wonder?"

For a moment they're both just still.

And then, Sako, still staring into Raito's eyes, his own suddenly wide and excited, is reaching down to touch.

"Get the fuck off me," Raito hisses.

"Looks like I just answered my own question."

And Raito is almost not hard at all, he was only looking, and if he was thinking - and he's still breathless and - and he isn't going to lose like this!

"Perhaps I don't need to wonder," he hisses back. "Perhaps I don't need to get my kicks from stupid games."

Ryuk has scrambled off the chair, come to stand next to them, close enough that he could lick them if he wanted. Raito doesn't mind. It's just something else he knows that Sako doesn't.

"But you are, this time," Sako murmurs, "aren't you?" And he's still touching, and Raito can see, Sako intends to taint Raito, prevent him from ever telling, because like it or not Sako is the vulnerable one here, all Raito's secrets are locked away, even the one standing right next to them, and Sako doesn't know -

He hears himself gasp. His breath shudders up through his throat and Sako smiles - a wide-eyed, hysterical smile that Raito is willing to bet no one else has ever seen - and, with his other hand, strokes Raito's face, and says, "Aw. Not so pure and perfect after all, are you?"

"Do you want me to cry and tell you to leave me alone?" Raito closes his eyes a moment, he won't lose just because of - not like that - and he wants to see Sako scared, god he wants Sako to know that Raito could kill him if he wanted -

"I just want to know why you're not more... upset. Seems odd to me. Most people get really scared when they find someone's been pretending to be someone else. I want to know what you're hiding."

"I'm not hiding anything." Raito grips his teeth, tries to keep still, tries not to let Sako know how much of an effect he's having. "I'm just... just a normal high school student..." The other guy is hard against him already - pathetic - and Raito doesn't intend to give him relief; not yet, at any rate. Instead he leans forward, trying to control his breathing, trying not to think about the fingers working away while his shinigami stands close enough to touch -

"Oh, come on. You're just as much a liar as me," Sako whispers, and kisses him, hard, almost a bite, and he fights not to tremble or press closer but he doesn't succeed because Sako feels it anyway and between more kisses he's hissing, "No wonder you ignore all the girls. What would they say if they knew?"

"The same thing... the same thing I imagine Anzai-san would. Be a shame for... such a lovely couple to... fall apart... what would her father say?"

Sako tenses.

(Yes, you know I still hold all the cards -) Raito smiles against Sako's mouth and for a moment he thinks Sako's going to break away and just punch him but instead, after a second, the other guy has stopped touching him (no noise, no need for any noise) and just pressed up close, hands on Raito's head, tangled in his hair, wrenching his head back, and (he still wants and he shouldn't be wanting and he doesn't lose except -)

"Why don't you admit how much you like it?" Sako whispers. "I'm tired of the way you keep pretending."

Raito will not press close and he will not touch himself and he will absolutely not beg Sako to carry on, so instead he just stares but he's trembling, and he has to swallow more than once and Sako sees because Sako is looking for any sign he can -

"After all," Sako says, "this is my house. I think I want to see you be honest for once."

And it's pathetic and stupid and wrong but he groans and he arches against Sako's hands on his head and he is shoving himself forward and rubbing himself up against Sako's body and he will see the bastard dead for this, dead, dead, dead, he is Kira and nobody gets away with treating him like that -

As he comes (and it's not good, it's strong and horrible and like he's not him at all and yet, and yet) he feels Sako let go of his head, run his hands down onto Raito's shoulders, and then they tense, dig in, and then they relax, and then he and Sako are staring at each other.

"I don't think revision is really going to be practical, is it," Raito says at last, and his voice is almost completely calm.

Sako still watches. Eventually he shakes his head.

"Perhaps we should reschedule," he says, and steps back from Raito, hands at his sides.

"Perhaps."

Raito walks forward - Ryuk follows, chuckling - and flicks up the lock on the door again.

"You should take better care of your possessions, Sako-kun," he says. "Trust me, I know how dangerous it might be if people find out your secrets."

"I'm sure you would." Sako smiles, suddenly. "I don't think I've ever seen you so furious before."

Raito manages to do nothing more than just smile, blandly, and says, "I think we've both learnt something today, haven't we? But it probably wouldn't be a good idea to clue other people in."

"No. Not right now, anyway. We'll have to see what happens next, won't we? Have a safe journey home, Yagami-kun."



[Title] Crimes of Necessity
[Fandom] Death Note/Saw
[Rating] PG for violence
[Notes/Summary] Teru Mikami has found a new god to follow.



The sun has set now. Mikami finds himself breathing more calmly. On schedule. He has not failed, not this time.

The sunset seems to be calming the woman as well. Earlier she shouted at him, screamed obscenities, accused him of hurting her children as if he were the sinner. Now she's calmer. She sits on her bedroom floor with her head slumped, her short hair tangled, dressing gown over the nightclothes she had just put on when he had found her. He had insisted she wear it, pointed out that it gets cold at night even in the summer and that she wouldn't have a chance to put it on later.

"So," she says suddenly, looking up at him, the bruise like a shadow across her face even in the milky twilight oozing through the curtains. "What happens now?"

"We will have to wait a while. I hope it won't be too uncomfortable for you."

She snorts. "I'm sure."

He doesn't think it will be. He made sure the cuffs weren't too tight, and the two daughters are locked in their rooms, the younger one not even aware of what's happening.

She glances over at the tape recorder and mike, then away as if it scares her. Mikami can understand why it might; you hear stories, about women being recorded, and so he says, "You understand, it's only so he can hear you really are present."

"So you and the bastards you're working with can prove to my husband you can murder me if he doesn't do what they want."

"It isn't like that." Mikami has rehearsed this moment in his head, and he's known she would argue, make all the old points, but he hears his voice tremble a little. Outside a car rushes past, and the woman turns at the sound as if she thinks the driver might be able to see through the walls.

"Then how is it?" she snaps. "You've forced your way in here and taken us hostage and you tell me that - that Shuichi needs to see us like this and -" She swallows, hard. "What exactly am I misunderstanding here?"

"It - it's to help. It is to help your husband."

She laughs. A faint sobbing laugh and she lets her head slump back against the bedpost and she says, "My god. You really are crazy. How exactly is kidnapping his family going to help him?"

Mikami wants to sit down next to her, but he finds himself remaining by the wall, arms folded. As if he's vulnerable in front of her.

"Have you heard of the Jigsaw Killer?" he says.

She goes pale, so pale that the shadow seems to cover her whole face and her eyes sink into darkness. She doesn't even nod.

"They shouldn't call him that," Mikami says, feeling a little more confident now he's on familiar ground. "He isn't a killer. He wants to help people. He wants to save them."

"I... I must be thinking of a different Jigsaw," she says, but she sounds sick now, sick and frightened. "The one I... I heard of has murdered dozens of people. He killed a man my husband worked with. Tell me... who are you speaking about?"

"Your husband hasn't been coming home much recently, has he?"

"He's been trying to hunt down that - that maniac!" she snaps, but she's not looking at him. "It's his job!"

"Jigsaw... he wants to..."

("I want to help. I think you want to help, too."

And his head still hurts from the gas and he doesn't know why he's here and it's filthy, it's all so filthy and the light is too bright and he can hear himself crying as if it isn't him at all but

that remark stops it)

"So many people waste their lives. They lie and cheat and steal and they don't understand how lucky they are to be alive at all, how their ways are ruining life for everyone."

("Haven't you always thought so? And there doesn't seem to be any way of making them realise how wrong they are.

"Sometimes)

"Sometimes there's only one way to make a point -"

"What have we done?" she screams up at him. "What have Shuichi and I done, what have our children done, why are you doing this?"

"Your husband needs to understand. He doesn't value his family any more. He has become obsessed with catching the only person who is doing any good in this world."

She is leaning up, trying to get at him as if she's forgotten the cuffs are there. "How dare you talk like that about him? How dare you?"

Mikami doesn't argue back this time. He just waits for her to see that there is truth in what he's saying, and at last she does, she slumps back, taking little gulps of air, not looking at him again.

"If he can overcome that," Mikami says, "none of you will have to die."

"And - and if he can't? If he doesn't meet your standards?"

Mikami doesn't want this to happen.

There's silence for a second, and then she wrenches out the words, "You're going to murder me and two innocent girls in cold blood if Shuichi doesn't do what you want. Don't you think maybe you're on the wrong side? Don't you think you're the one ruining things for everyone?"

("Come and see."

He gets up and he stumbles over to the mirror.

And there is a man on the other side, a businessman, and "you should know yourself that bullying doesn't stop once you leave high school" and Mikami watches and up til now he was thinking only of how not to die and how he mustn't fail God but then, but then, and the man, who is tall with a brutally good-looking face, who could easily be one of the evil ones from school but is currently looking sick and pale like Mikami always felt, the man doesn't even listen to the instructions on the tape he's been given and then

then there is blood spattering everywhere, over the man's face and silk shirt and smart suit and spiky hair and Mikami watches and

and

help me help me oh God please

and

there is so much blood

and

And. And all at once he sees. Like he saw when his mother dies, he sees and he understands and it's no longer fear that he'll be harmed, it's a new terror, because who can look on the face of God's emissary and not fear?

"How else)

"How else will people change their ways? How else will they get the strength if there's nothing at risk?" He doesn't bother to explain about God. No one ever understands that. Even Jigsaw doesn't ever talk about it but Mikami doesn't mind because he knows.

"Your husband loves you," he says to her. "He'll find the strength. You must tell him what he has to do. I'll explain what to say."

To be continued