tallulahgs (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
tallulahgs) wrote2008-03-17 09:15 pm
tallulahgs) wrote2008-03-17 09:15 pm
Entry tags:
And you will know us by the trail of fanfiction
[Title] The Nature of Justice
[Fandom] Death Note/Saw
[Rating] PG-13, possibly R, for violence
[Notes/Summary] Raito chose to bring an ally into his war against L... and now three high-minded geniuses are attempting to do what's right. (This one kind of... ran away with me a little. And I'm sure I wasn't smart enough to set out the machinations of the three central players, but I couldn't not write this...) Written for and crossposted to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
40fandoms.
In any war, there are sacrifices. Raito learnt that a long time ago (Daddy's not home tonight because he's got to be at work, keep other people safe) and being Kira has only underlined it.
(He had to kill L. When it's kill or be killed - and Kira is mighty, Kira is a god, L shouldn't have dared)
The house is narrow and smells of mildew and the windows are boarded up and dust hangs in the air as they creep through it. To die here -
The end justifies the means. That's something else he learnt long ago and being Kira has meant he has to believe it. And this end? L is dead and the killer who's been preying on innocents (well, not innocents, but Raito can't respect the man's methods and so can't publicly respect his ideals, either) will be captured and it will all be down to Kira and -
This means -
(Would L have panicked? Begged for mercy? What are they going to find when they open that door?)
Raito follows his father, walks carefully, keeping his eyes open for trip wires or any other nasty surprises. The door is so close. This feels good. It does. L is dead. Oh, the Jigsaw killer professes to allow his victims a chance of escape, but that's
(stupid thinking. If people deserve to suffer that, then they deserve to die)
just a lie he doubtless tells himself, or at least tells the world, in order to convince himself he's not a criminal. Just like all the rest.
Raito's father stops, holds up a hand, and they all halt immediately. Raito keeps an expression of worry on his face. Behind him, he can hear Ryuk snickering.
"Listen -"
There are footsteps behind the door.
"Do you think - Ryuzaki?" Raito makes himself sound young, frightened, hopeful. "It could be -"
"Don't move," his father snaps back, and so Raito doesn't, stands in a cluster with the rest of the task force, show yourself, let the pieces fall into place -
The door creaks open.
L. L standing there, his pale clothes spattered with blood. One hand covers an eye. Apart from these, he looks no different from normal; as bored and superior as always.
(he's meant -
he was supposed to -)
Ryuk is laughing even more, and suddenly Raito is scared after all.
"Ryuzaki - are you all right?" his father gasps.
L lets his hand fall to his side, and stares at them with one wide eye and one empty socket. Blood oozes down his cheek.
"Don't look so surprised," he says at last, when he notices their horror. "Removal of one's eye in order to... stay alive is clearly the most logical course of action..." And suddenly he sways on his feet, grabs for the doorframe. "Obviously a certain amount of pain was involved, but..."
He smiles at Raito. It's a mimic of his normal bland grin. It's got pain in it, and anger.
"I am, as you can see, not dead."
(he was supposed to -)
"Is Jigsaw in there?" Chief Yagami demands, sounding more furious than Raito has heard him for a long time. "Let's -"
"Ryuzaki -" Watari is moving forward too. Raito grits his teeth, wishes he could make them all freeze until he's worked out what went wrong, L was supposed to die, he was supposed to be forced into doing something impossible, it's not supposed to work like this -
"Please, remain quite still," L says. "For one thing, I suspect there is a sixty-five percent chance that Jigsaw is no longer in the building. For another, it would not be advantageous to catching Kira if any of you walked into any traps that might be located in the near vicinity. And thirdly..."
In his non-bloodstained hand he is holding a small cassette player.
"Jigsaw has left me a further message, which I was requested to play in your hearing. I am rather concerned that - that it will herald the start of another game, but if it does, then something... unpleasant will have been set up to happen anyway, and we may as well be forewarned."
"We should play it later," Chief Yagami says. "After we've got you to a hospital -"
"No," L says, and suddenly his face is sharp and furious and the bloodstains don't seem incongruous any more.
And he presses Play.
Hiss of blank tape for a moment, then a voice:
"Hello, Kira. You think -"
All the pieces falling into place -
L's eye widens.
"- you know who deserves to live and who deserves to die."
A small, happy smile creeps across L's face. (How can he smile, how dare he, he should be hurting, he should be dead, it's not fair -)
"You proved that when you sent your friend into my game."
Everyone looking - L looking and the dark, bloody socket watching him -
And L still smiling -
"You decided he deserved to die because he was opposing you. No better than the criminals you judge. And now he's won his life, and he has also won yours. In a few seconds, the recording of our conversation will play, and your identity will be revealed. You don't believe people can change, whereas I do. Can you overcome your arrogance and give yourself up? If you can, you might even get to live. If you can't, then you'll just have to have your conceit cut away by force.
Live or die, Raito Yagami. Make your choice."
"No no no he's lying he's lying he's -"
"Raito, please," L says, pausing the tape. "This hasn't finished yet." But he's still smiling, even though his face is burning white now and he's trembling, just slightly.
"I'm not Kira! He's a fucking psychopath, how can you believe him?"
"I had wondered," L says, staring thoughtfully at the tape player, "how he learnt of my existence, considering my precautions when it comes to revealing my face. I didn't have a great deal of time for reflection in there, but it did occur to me that someone in the task force may have had something to do with it." He looks back up. He's not smiling now. "Now, be quiet and let me hear what else there is to hear."
Raito stares round at the rest of the task force, but everyone is looking at L. Even Chief Yagami is looking at L. Raito sees a glimpse of his expression.
He believes them - a killer and - and an enemy of justice - he believes them over me -
L starts the tape playing again. And now Raito's own voice is echoing round the tiny hallway, calm and assured and Raito wants to scream wake up, don't you see, he's failed you -
"So it's agreed? We both know L deserves to die."
"He deserves a chance to change."
"With you it will doubtless come down to the same thing in the end. Though I won't complain if he... revises his ideals before he passes away."
The tape ends.
L looks up at Raito.
"It saddens me that you would get someone else to do your work, Raito," he says. He looks tired now. "Please - don't make this difficult for yourself. Come quietly."
"Ryuzaki, listen. I - I - it wasn't..." Raito can feel them all watching him still. He's tired of being watched. He's tired... focus! Think - Screw L, he won't listen. "Father - Father, I - let me explain -"
"Don't speak to me." His father sounds so tired, so weak.
"I had to do it! Don't you understand? I had to! I got the power and I couldn't just sit by and let people get away with what they did -"
"Doubtless Jigsaw feels the same way," L murmurs. "Indeed, I have some sympathy with that statement myself. But that does not mean that I can condone your actions." He frowns, stares down at his bloodstained fingers. "You didn't condone mine, after all." And now he's not even looking at Raito and somehow that's worse, how dare he act like I'm nothing, I'm -
"Please," L says, "take Kira into custody."
To be handcuffed and marched out of here like a criminal and and and and then they lock you up and it's just darkness and one tiny room and people watching and nothing else ever ever ever
He's turned and he's running (fleeing) back towards the front door before he can think and he can just see sunlight round the edges and I'll get out, get out and hide and then I can come back, L is calling his name, Ryuk will follow, I'll come back, come back stronger, it'll be -
He wrenches the door open.
And from the low ceiling above something slices down and he sees it and for one second he realises -
And then there's nothing but darkness, and red.
***
L is lying in the hospital bed, both eyes covered, but he greets Watari by name when the man approaches as if he recognised the footsteps.
"How are you feeling, Ryuzaki?"
L considers, but then he says instead, "I was aware that the front door was not safe. I did not wish him to step into that trap, though."
Watari sits down by the bed. "Did you know all along what was supposed to happen?"
"The puppet gave me the tape..." L's voice is quiet, almost sleepy for once. "It informed me that I had... won my freedom, and it hoped that I had learnt a new way of... looking at life. It then suggested I use this new way of looking to... observe Kira.
I was not happy with the idea of following Jigsaw's ideas. But..." He stops again. "I will find him, Watari."
"Jigsaw?"
"Are you surprised?"
"No. I didn't think you would consider him an ally."
"It was quick," L says. "The guillotine usually is, I believe. I am only sorry that Chief Yagami had to see his son being... bisected like that." His mouth curves into something that's not quite a smile. "Have your conceit cut away by force..."
"I will do what I can to help his father."
"And then we will go after Jigsaw," L says decisively. "After all... someone has to see that justice is done."
[Fandom] Death Note/Saw
[Rating] PG-13, possibly R, for violence
[Notes/Summary] Raito chose to bring an ally into his war against L... and now three high-minded geniuses are attempting to do what's right. (This one kind of... ran away with me a little. And I'm sure I wasn't smart enough to set out the machinations of the three central players, but I couldn't not write this...) Written for and crossposted to
40fandoms.In any war, there are sacrifices. Raito learnt that a long time ago (Daddy's not home tonight because he's got to be at work, keep other people safe) and being Kira has only underlined it.
(He had to kill L. When it's kill or be killed - and Kira is mighty, Kira is a god, L shouldn't have dared)
The house is narrow and smells of mildew and the windows are boarded up and dust hangs in the air as they creep through it. To die here -
The end justifies the means. That's something else he learnt long ago and being Kira has meant he has to believe it. And this end? L is dead and the killer who's been preying on innocents (well, not innocents, but Raito can't respect the man's methods and so can't publicly respect his ideals, either) will be captured and it will all be down to Kira and -
This means -
(Would L have panicked? Begged for mercy? What are they going to find when they open that door?)
Raito follows his father, walks carefully, keeping his eyes open for trip wires or any other nasty surprises. The door is so close. This feels good. It does. L is dead. Oh, the Jigsaw killer professes to allow his victims a chance of escape, but that's
(stupid thinking. If people deserve to suffer that, then they deserve to die)
just a lie he doubtless tells himself, or at least tells the world, in order to convince himself he's not a criminal. Just like all the rest.
Raito's father stops, holds up a hand, and they all halt immediately. Raito keeps an expression of worry on his face. Behind him, he can hear Ryuk snickering.
"Listen -"
There are footsteps behind the door.
"Do you think - Ryuzaki?" Raito makes himself sound young, frightened, hopeful. "It could be -"
"Don't move," his father snaps back, and so Raito doesn't, stands in a cluster with the rest of the task force, show yourself, let the pieces fall into place -
The door creaks open.
L. L standing there, his pale clothes spattered with blood. One hand covers an eye. Apart from these, he looks no different from normal; as bored and superior as always.
(he's meant -
he was supposed to -)
Ryuk is laughing even more, and suddenly Raito is scared after all.
"Ryuzaki - are you all right?" his father gasps.
L lets his hand fall to his side, and stares at them with one wide eye and one empty socket. Blood oozes down his cheek.
"Don't look so surprised," he says at last, when he notices their horror. "Removal of one's eye in order to... stay alive is clearly the most logical course of action..." And suddenly he sways on his feet, grabs for the doorframe. "Obviously a certain amount of pain was involved, but..."
He smiles at Raito. It's a mimic of his normal bland grin. It's got pain in it, and anger.
"I am, as you can see, not dead."
(he was supposed to -)
"Is Jigsaw in there?" Chief Yagami demands, sounding more furious than Raito has heard him for a long time. "Let's -"
"Ryuzaki -" Watari is moving forward too. Raito grits his teeth, wishes he could make them all freeze until he's worked out what went wrong, L was supposed to die, he was supposed to be forced into doing something impossible, it's not supposed to work like this -
"Please, remain quite still," L says. "For one thing, I suspect there is a sixty-five percent chance that Jigsaw is no longer in the building. For another, it would not be advantageous to catching Kira if any of you walked into any traps that might be located in the near vicinity. And thirdly..."
In his non-bloodstained hand he is holding a small cassette player.
"Jigsaw has left me a further message, which I was requested to play in your hearing. I am rather concerned that - that it will herald the start of another game, but if it does, then something... unpleasant will have been set up to happen anyway, and we may as well be forewarned."
"We should play it later," Chief Yagami says. "After we've got you to a hospital -"
"No," L says, and suddenly his face is sharp and furious and the bloodstains don't seem incongruous any more.
And he presses Play.
Hiss of blank tape for a moment, then a voice:
"Hello, Kira. You think -"
All the pieces falling into place -
L's eye widens.
"- you know who deserves to live and who deserves to die."
A small, happy smile creeps across L's face. (How can he smile, how dare he, he should be hurting, he should be dead, it's not fair -)
"You proved that when you sent your friend into my game."
Everyone looking - L looking and the dark, bloody socket watching him -
And L still smiling -
"You decided he deserved to die because he was opposing you. No better than the criminals you judge. And now he's won his life, and he has also won yours. In a few seconds, the recording of our conversation will play, and your identity will be revealed. You don't believe people can change, whereas I do. Can you overcome your arrogance and give yourself up? If you can, you might even get to live. If you can't, then you'll just have to have your conceit cut away by force.
Live or die, Raito Yagami. Make your choice."
"No no no he's lying he's lying he's -"
"Raito, please," L says, pausing the tape. "This hasn't finished yet." But he's still smiling, even though his face is burning white now and he's trembling, just slightly.
"I'm not Kira! He's a fucking psychopath, how can you believe him?"
"I had wondered," L says, staring thoughtfully at the tape player, "how he learnt of my existence, considering my precautions when it comes to revealing my face. I didn't have a great deal of time for reflection in there, but it did occur to me that someone in the task force may have had something to do with it." He looks back up. He's not smiling now. "Now, be quiet and let me hear what else there is to hear."
Raito stares round at the rest of the task force, but everyone is looking at L. Even Chief Yagami is looking at L. Raito sees a glimpse of his expression.
He believes them - a killer and - and an enemy of justice - he believes them over me -
L starts the tape playing again. And now Raito's own voice is echoing round the tiny hallway, calm and assured and Raito wants to scream wake up, don't you see, he's failed you -
"So it's agreed? We both know L deserves to die."
"He deserves a chance to change."
"With you it will doubtless come down to the same thing in the end. Though I won't complain if he... revises his ideals before he passes away."
The tape ends.
L looks up at Raito.
"It saddens me that you would get someone else to do your work, Raito," he says. He looks tired now. "Please - don't make this difficult for yourself. Come quietly."
"Ryuzaki, listen. I - I - it wasn't..." Raito can feel them all watching him still. He's tired of being watched. He's tired... focus! Think - Screw L, he won't listen. "Father - Father, I - let me explain -"
"Don't speak to me." His father sounds so tired, so weak.
"I had to do it! Don't you understand? I had to! I got the power and I couldn't just sit by and let people get away with what they did -"
"Doubtless Jigsaw feels the same way," L murmurs. "Indeed, I have some sympathy with that statement myself. But that does not mean that I can condone your actions." He frowns, stares down at his bloodstained fingers. "You didn't condone mine, after all." And now he's not even looking at Raito and somehow that's worse, how dare he act like I'm nothing, I'm -
"Please," L says, "take Kira into custody."
To be handcuffed and marched out of here like a criminal and and and and then they lock you up and it's just darkness and one tiny room and people watching and nothing else ever ever ever
He's turned and he's running (fleeing) back towards the front door before he can think and he can just see sunlight round the edges and I'll get out, get out and hide and then I can come back, L is calling his name, Ryuk will follow, I'll come back, come back stronger, it'll be -
He wrenches the door open.
And from the low ceiling above something slices down and he sees it and for one second he realises -
And then there's nothing but darkness, and red.
***
L is lying in the hospital bed, both eyes covered, but he greets Watari by name when the man approaches as if he recognised the footsteps.
"How are you feeling, Ryuzaki?"
L considers, but then he says instead, "I was aware that the front door was not safe. I did not wish him to step into that trap, though."
Watari sits down by the bed. "Did you know all along what was supposed to happen?"
"The puppet gave me the tape..." L's voice is quiet, almost sleepy for once. "It informed me that I had... won my freedom, and it hoped that I had learnt a new way of... looking at life. It then suggested I use this new way of looking to... observe Kira.
I was not happy with the idea of following Jigsaw's ideas. But..." He stops again. "I will find him, Watari."
"Jigsaw?"
"Are you surprised?"
"No. I didn't think you would consider him an ally."
"It was quick," L says. "The guillotine usually is, I believe. I am only sorry that Chief Yagami had to see his son being... bisected like that." His mouth curves into something that's not quite a smile. "Have your conceit cut away by force..."
"I will do what I can to help his father."
"And then we will go after Jigsaw," L says decisively. "After all... someone has to see that justice is done."
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Your reaction is possibly the best reaction ever. Thanks :D
*looks guiltily at Raito* It was all his fault. Really. Um...
actually actual slicing in half was kind of what I was going for...
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Yeah, it kind of is his fault though, thinking he could outsmart Raito like that. By the way, the eye scene right at the start of Saw 2 is possibly the one I find the most traumatising, so poor L too!
You always kill Raito. ;__; and normally I hate character death fics but yours are always so well done that my reactions hover between AAAHOMGASDHJKLJNOOOOOO and OMGGGGWOAHHHH♥. YOU CONFUSE ME SO.
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*giggles* I know the feeling. Raito is often on my mind too...
That eye scene is the one that really stuck in my mind as an 'oh gods noooooooo' moment (and this was just reading a summary) and when I figured L is always watching people, well... yeah... *is very sorry she did that to L*
I AM SORRY TO CONFUSE YOU SO BUT FLATTERED THAT I MANAGE TO GET AN 'OMGGGGWOAAHHH' WITH HEARTS :D
Thank you very much! *glee*
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And now I am imagining L waking up in a locked room while the freaky recorded voice goes on about how he always watches people and things. If I can't sleep tonight I am totally blaming you. XD
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I seem to recall the rest of Saw 2 doesn't involve eyeballs, although there's some pretty nasty stuff *was always squicked by the trap where you stick your hands in and they get stuck because of the razors*
But L is one of the few people who would be able to cope! It would just be all '*sigh* *vaguely annoyed expression* *looks thoughtfully at handily provided scalpel* *makes mental note to get revenge on Raito for this*'... you know, not panicking. *nods*
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That's true, if anyone could've come out of the eye trap alive I guess it would be L. But Raito!! D: I saw this awesome poster of Raito today, it was him during the Yotsuba arc and he looked all innocent and there were HANDCUFFS IN THE BACKGROUND and ;____;
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And that poster sounds awesome. *wants*
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Still.
If I have nightmares, I am SO blaming you.
This was brilliantly disturbing.
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*blames Jigsaw*
I'm... glad this worked the way it was meant to... :D
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Anyway! This is one of the fics I'd read a while back but forgot to do a comment for, so here it is! It's a fantastic story, and you're totally right about L being the type to just logically do what's best for himself - the cost of an eye is totally worth walking away alive and all that. The Light-getting-cut-in-half thing was actually a nice touch, too, as I expected something more along the lines of...like...getting his brain partially and forcibly removed somehow.
And Chief Yagami's "don't talk to me" line was wicked powerful. Great job!
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(How do you feel about actually watching someone saw off their own leg?)
Anyway, thank you very much! I enjoyed writing this waaaay too much XD (hmm, brain... that's not a bad idea... okay, need to stop thinking...)
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(I don't think I could actually watch that sort of thing, now that you mention it. The thought of seeing that is making me a bit queasy. XD)
Any partial-or-full brain removal stuff has a "train wreck" effect on me; it's horrible and fascinating at the same time, so no matter how much I want to avert my eyes I can't stop watching. There's a manga series called Battle Angel Alita that does this sort of thing a lot, and I'd stop reading it if the story itself weren't fantastic. Cause, I mean, it's your thoughts, you know? It's an important part of what makes you who you are, and it's just being removed. The worst case of this is in one of the Hannibal Lecter movies, where Ole Lecty cooks pieces of this guy's brain and feeds it to him while he's strapped to a chair. (Again, nothing I've seen in person - only heard about through others.)
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...
fjkdkfjkdfjkd
OH HANNIBEL LECTER WHY ;_; ;_; *cries*