Fanfiction
Apr. 16th, 2008 06:02 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tallulahgs[Title] Babysitter
[Fandom] Death Note
[Rating] G
[Pairings/Characters] Sayu, Sachiko
[Word Count] 525
[Prompt] Pokemon (written for and crossposted to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
dn_contest)
[Notes/Summary] Sachiko tries her hardest to look after a catatonic Sayu.
As the sun sinks behind a cloud again, Sachiko helps Sayu back inside, lifts her onto the couch, where she will remain until she can be put to bed again without it looking unkind.
"Would you like to watch some TV, Sayu?"
(What's the point? She never answers. But she might care - Sachiko believes firmly that behind the dull face there is still Sayu, because if she doesn't then her daughter may as well be dead -)
(Or does she really believe it? If behind the dull face there is still Sayu, it means Sayu is trapped behind that face; maybe she's screaming every second of the day but Sachiko can't hear her -)
(Or if behind the dull face there is still Sayu, it could mean Sayu has chosen to switch herself off, chosen to give up on the future and hope and choice and conversation, and elected instead to make her mother lift her and dress her and talk for her and worry and cry, and doesn't care -)
Sachiko switches on the TV, and then stands, midway between it and the couch. Leaving her daughter lying here with a blanket half-over her legs as if she has stayed home sick from school, and going off to do something else -
(It makes you a bad mother if you let TV be a babysitter. Because then your child will grow up stunted and stupid.)
(If you ration TV, then your child grows up clever and talkative and interested. Sachiko feels as if someone, somewhere, reneged on a deal.)
So she sits down next to Sayu - Sayu doesn't move her feet to make room - and watches, pretends she is interested in... Pokemon, isn't it? Yes.
"I remember when you and Light used to play Pokemon. He said he thought that the cards were boring, and he never did like computer games much, did he, Sayu?" She's tired of the silence. "But you liked this show, and so you'd get him to make up stories about it, wouldn't you? You always wanted to be Pikachu." She remembers that name because of these games, because eight-year-old Sayu would run through the house shrieking it, Pika Pikachuuu! (She told Sayu to be quieter.) "You remember, don't you?"
(What if she doesn't remember anything, and she doesn't know why she's even here? What if she thinks it's all my fault -)
On screen the heroes are being confronted by bad guys who no one is really scared of, who give everyone ample warning because of their introductory rhyme, who wear a uniform to tip everyone off that they're bad guys, and never manage to kidnap Pikachu no matter how hard they try.
(It's a stupid message to impart to children.)
Sayu's eyes move, just a little, to follow the movements.
Sachiko squeezes her hand - the gesture feels stupid, but she tells herself Sayu doesn't mean anything by not responding, she tries not to feel hurt - and sits and watches until the episode ends.
[Fandom] Death Note
[Rating] G
[Pairings/Characters] Sayu, Sachiko
[Word Count] 525
[Prompt] Pokemon (written for and crossposted to
dn_contest)[Notes/Summary] Sachiko tries her hardest to look after a catatonic Sayu.
As the sun sinks behind a cloud again, Sachiko helps Sayu back inside, lifts her onto the couch, where she will remain until she can be put to bed again without it looking unkind.
"Would you like to watch some TV, Sayu?"
(What's the point? She never answers. But she might care - Sachiko believes firmly that behind the dull face there is still Sayu, because if she doesn't then her daughter may as well be dead -)
(Or does she really believe it? If behind the dull face there is still Sayu, it means Sayu is trapped behind that face; maybe she's screaming every second of the day but Sachiko can't hear her -)
(Or if behind the dull face there is still Sayu, it could mean Sayu has chosen to switch herself off, chosen to give up on the future and hope and choice and conversation, and elected instead to make her mother lift her and dress her and talk for her and worry and cry, and doesn't care -)
Sachiko switches on the TV, and then stands, midway between it and the couch. Leaving her daughter lying here with a blanket half-over her legs as if she has stayed home sick from school, and going off to do something else -
(It makes you a bad mother if you let TV be a babysitter. Because then your child will grow up stunted and stupid.)
(If you ration TV, then your child grows up clever and talkative and interested. Sachiko feels as if someone, somewhere, reneged on a deal.)
So she sits down next to Sayu - Sayu doesn't move her feet to make room - and watches, pretends she is interested in... Pokemon, isn't it? Yes.
"I remember when you and Light used to play Pokemon. He said he thought that the cards were boring, and he never did like computer games much, did he, Sayu?" She's tired of the silence. "But you liked this show, and so you'd get him to make up stories about it, wouldn't you? You always wanted to be Pikachu." She remembers that name because of these games, because eight-year-old Sayu would run through the house shrieking it, Pika Pikachuuu! (She told Sayu to be quieter.) "You remember, don't you?"
(What if she doesn't remember anything, and she doesn't know why she's even here? What if she thinks it's all my fault -)
On screen the heroes are being confronted by bad guys who no one is really scared of, who give everyone ample warning because of their introductory rhyme, who wear a uniform to tip everyone off that they're bad guys, and never manage to kidnap Pikachu no matter how hard they try.
(It's a stupid message to impart to children.)
Sayu's eyes move, just a little, to follow the movements.
Sachiko squeezes her hand - the gesture feels stupid, but she tells herself Sayu doesn't mean anything by not responding, she tries not to feel hurt - and sits and watches until the episode ends.
